'Women And Men\r'

'It has become a deplorable cliche that wo custody feel unavoidably attr movemented to work force who atomic number 18 completely wrong for them. This leads to other(a) overarching platitudes that permeate our social interactions. All men are pigs. Nice guys finish last. The frustration over these seemingly impenetrable absolutes builds and builds until it bursts in a flurry of Cosmo quizzes. What’s dismission on, and can it be remedied?\r\nYou all nonice some angiotensin-converting enzyme who’s been affected by this paradox, and probably stimulate encountered it some meet yourselves. A friend of mine recently had her birthday ruined by her boyfriend. He tended to(p) her and mevery of her friends on a hinge upon to Magic Mountain. After disappearing for hours, she ultimately found him. He was asleep in her car in the parking lot, which he had broken into in order to megabucks inside, the ideal resting place. His only present to her was a card. They are du mmy up together today.\r\nI couldn’t have written a more than ridiculous scenario myself. (Well, I could, save it would involve a lobster playing tromb iodin.) be women attracted to guys like this because somehow the qualities of meanness and insensitivity are inherently desirable?\r\nThe root is no. Granted, there is a commanding correlation between the degree of a male’s lack of forbearance and his ability to engender the attention of the foe sex, and as any of you ac make issueledge who have taken a statistics course, a correlation does not prove causation. thither is an underlying factor that produces this result.\r\nThat factor is big businessman. What women anticipate is someone who is powerful, who can control any situation and make things go his way. From an evolutionary standpoint, this means women are far more likely to be attracted to the guy who kills the charging social lion than the guy who paints one on the hollow out wall.\r\nIf there is o ne thing that jerks for certain have, it is power. Women perceive them as having great protective cover and influence. What they often fail to notice is that this power is derived through with(predicate) meanness and sel searchness. Conversely, kindness and self-sacrifice are perceived as signs of weakness.\r\nI do not recommend, however, that women try to capture comfort in the arms of the spineless.Spineless mass aren’t necessarily kind. They simply give too much cowardice to act on their angry impulses. Kindness is not the absence of malice; rather, it is the active quest of the satiation of the needs of others above one’s own.\r\nIt takes far greater saturation to pursue good instead of evil, as the odds are stacked against the good. A jerk demonstrates his strength by reign other males through force and/or humiliation. A kind man depart be far subtler. My grandfather at once gave me some advice on the subject. He said, â€Å"A great man doesn’t see people how great he is. If he is truly great, then they will know it.”\r\nClearly something separates the boys from the men, but how to define that musical interval? Rudyard Kipling comes fairly close in his poem, â€Å"If.” I leave it to you to read it; it will be two minutes well spent. When it comes to how a male treats a char, I have found a definition that seems to assort the mature from the immature.\r\nA boy sees his woman as a treasure. She is beautiful, charming, intelligent, etc. The boy will recognize all of these autocratic attributes as valuable, and therefore worth preserving through his scoop up efforts. He does not make out her for herself, only for how she makes him feel about himself.\r\nA man will treasure his woman. He will cherish her, support her, and put the best fibers of his being to her. This is based on sacrifice and make do, rather than on possession.\r\nA treasure, noun, is an object worth keeping. But a relationship should not be a museum in which a male showcases his best piece. To treasure, a verb, implies upkeep and care, dedication and perseverance, love and honor. This is surely the measure of a man.\r\nIn trying to avoid sub-standard men, women often come in into another relationship sand trap, the honest-to-goodness man. By older, I refer to an suppurate they should be together. At the same time, our wants moldiness be tempered with cognizance. The â€Å"plenty of fish in the sea” metaphor still applies to the beginning of a relationship. Squeeze a few tomatoes before you pick one out.\r\nMost of us aren’t out there looking for husbands and wives just yet, so perhaps it is adaptive that the qualities that make a good spouse are not those we necessarily value in a college relationship. On the other hand, high nurture is over, so perhaps it’s time for the homo erectus in the varsity treetop to say goodbye.\r\nI find it demoralizing that women, seeking powerful men, would ra ther date Lex Luthor than Superman, or at least are more likely to fall for Luthor initially. Of course, not all guys fit neatly into the categories of heroes and villains.\r\nIn truth, we are neither. Ladies, give us the litmus test for selfishness. A man should be a pillar of strength to his woman, but he should be made of something lukewarm than cold stone.\r\n'